Jacinda Ardern, New Zealand (NZ) Prime Minister, celebrated her Labour Party’s success in the recent elections, winning 61 of the 120 seats in the House of Representatives. This is the first single-party Government since the new system of proportional representation voting system replaced the first-past-the-post system in 1996. Before now, and since 1996, coalition Government […]
When a major crime is committed in plain sight, it is a very British thing to walk past with a “nothing to see here, let’s move along” look on the face. We simply don’t want to get involved.
An updated and expanded version of In Limbo has recently been published by Spokesman Books. The first edition covered the fears, anxieties and feelings of betrayal – by the UK, by friends and, in some cases, by families – of EU citizens living in the UK. Does the updated version tell us of a happy […]
New Bond film postponed! Cinemas closing! ‘The Man Who Would Be King’ re-make cancelled! But, good news! The staff here at Spoof News have been secretly collaborating with a Westminster Film Club to review a re-make of ‘The Green Mile’ film, in which a condemned inmate, walks to his demise followed by the incessant chants […]
Since last Sunday I have had my eyes glued to this very screen in which I am now endeavouring to write this piece. Whilst physically I have crossed from the West of England to the East and am back within the brick walls of my university accommodation, most of my classes languish on the virtual […]
“For thousands more years the mighty ships tore across the empty wastes of space and finally dived screaming on to the first planet they came across – which happened to be the Earth – where due to a terrible miscalculation of scale the entire battle fleet was accidentally swallowed by a small dog.”Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide […]
By late August, despite all the difficulties in the summer, little seemed to have changed. The negotiations were stuck and it was widely acknowledged that top level political intervention would be necessary in the Autumn to kick-start the process. Well, the UK Internal Market Bill has certainly been a top level political intervention. Introduced in […]
Part Two – Referendum Lies Ed: After Paul’s popular review of the saga of the EU Referendum Leave Campaign, he lists the lies that sustained it. Here is some of what, informally, I remember from the Leave campaign during the Referendum: ‘£350 million every week for the NHS’ (Cummings, Johnson etc.). Clearly untrue from the […]
The Cartoon Times has obtained exclusive access to a childhood picture of our leader Boris. Has this spoilt baby turned into the politician who only cares for himself and flouts all the rules going. Will he learn that in the real world rules must be followed and leaders must set an example. Let’s hope our […]
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (Ed: Only for Star Wars fans) Once upon a time, a long time ago, it was quite possible to respect some or most of the government or opposition regardless of how you voted. You could imagine having a chat, a coffee, a beer. You’d probably […]
Ed: We have reproduced this letter from 1st October in full and added our own cartoon to illustrate some of the issues. Dear [Ms Smyth} We are a group of south Bristol parents whose children are at university in different locations across the country (Leeds, Birmingham, Cardiff, Bournemouth, Belfast, Glasgow, London, with friends at many […]
Part One – How it all happened The United Kingdom has left the European Union, after around five decades. On December 31 2020 we will be at the end of the Transition Period. All our existing national mutual arrangements, treaties and deals with the EU on all matters will end. Unless there is a Deal. […]
While the media have failed to report it widely, NHS workers have already demonstrated twice since July. Marches took place in 30 cities on 8 August, bringing together thousands of people. NHS employees held a minute’s silence for the 640 colleagues who have died during the Coronavirus crisis. Then on Saturday, 12 September hundreds of […]
Dr Monica Horten, a policy analyst specialising in Internet governance & European policy, has recently published a damning article on the procurement of a share in the OneWeb satellite system. We quote this in full from her www.iptegrity.com site. Last week, the Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy (BEIS) Select Committee called in satellite industry experts to […]
The Government’s track record on “Track and Trace” gives us no grounds for believing that “Operation Moonshot” will be any different. “Track and Trace” The following letter on “Track and Trace” has been sent to many local newspapers, including several in Wiltshire as well as the regional papers, Western Daily Press and Western Morning Press. […]
Starmer’s near silence on Brexit is not all bad news for pro-Europeans. Events will soon force him to say more. The full text of the short section devoted to Europe and Brexit in Keir Starmer’s speech yesterday to the virtual Labour Party conference is as follows: “The grown-up way to deal with Brexit is to […]
Mo Mowlam once said that “it’s the real life of people that needs change”, and yet we see with this government that it’s not the ‘real life of people’ but the structures of government and the authorities, that apparently need ‘change’. Whilst structural reform can help to improve the delivery of changes for people, there […]
First up – Rugby … The Cock Up Times in a special rugby feature includes an interview with loose forward, Cunning Cummings. In the interview he reveals how he likes to pretend to play on the blindside and is happy to work round any law that doesn’t suit him He thinks being offside is a […]
During the First and Second World Wars, we had Governments of National Unity to guide us through those awful times and rise to the challenges of those dreadful crises. By and large, these governments worked successfully. We are now faced in this country with four major crises which together are of comparable severity and difficulty, […]
Ireland. So often a question and rarely the answer. Back in the mists of time, maybe 2018, Theresa May’s government was mired in the “Irish Backstop”. It’s difficult to remember it now, so much has happened since. Whichever way she turned, her road was blocked. I don’t need to rehearse the old arguments that eventually […]
Our Prime Minister has a record of stupid and unscrupulous decisions. Yet nothing has prepared us for the Internal Market Bill
A London based individual, Mr PM Bumble, has reported experiencing considerable reliability issues with the car that he has been driving since December. Mr Bumble complained, ‘I had only been in charge of driving since July last year but took procession of this new car in December confident that it had over eighty improvements on […]
Clinging tenaciously to the party line, Danny Kruger, MP for Devizes, tells BBC Wiltshire that the government’s coyly named Internal Market Bill, introduced last week, contains only “minor technical tweaks” to protect the Good Friday peace deal. He’s wrong. Despite its innocuous title, the Bill is designed to evade key provisions of the Withdrawal Agreement; no more, no less. It does this by subordinating EU law to UK domestic […]
Open Letter to Nick Stovold, Chair of Wiltshire Conservatives Dear Mr Stovold, The Conservative Party has always been seen as the party of Law and Order. Defending the Rule of Law. Alas no more. The party of Margaret Thatcher is disappearing under a tidal wave of corruption and sleaze. Margaret Thatcher proclaimed in October 1996 […]
“British people will still be able to go and work in the EU; to live; to travel; to study; to buy homes and to settle down.” Boris Johnson, Daily Telegraph, 26 June 2016 A short boat trip across Mirabella Bay from the upmarket resort of Elounda in Crete gets you to the island of Spinalonga, […]
‘Blame the EU’. ‘Blame the Media’. Or even, ‘Blame the Referee’. We all do it. We deflect blame by blaming others when things go wrong. It’s easy. Just blame someone or something else. The buck doesn’t need to stop with you! If my football team loses this weekend, I can always blame the referee (and […]
The Government’s internal market bill, should it become law, will override the Withdrawal Agreement Act. No doubt during drafting, the Withdrawal Agreement was subject to line-by-line minute scrutiny by specialists in international law and trade. An agreement whose overall governance structure, according to the EU Commission, ensures its “effective management, implementation and enforcement … including appropriate […]
Liz Price from Oxford calls out Boris Johnson on his unprincipled behaviour and asks where statesmanship went. To: The Prime Minister, Boris Johnson Cc: Keir Starmer, MP, Leader of the Opposition Ed Davey MPLayla Moran MP 7 September 2020 Dear Mr Johnson, I am writing to express to you my anger at your current proposal […]
Our society, like all others, consists of waves of migration which have come over many generations and will continue to do so. Let us do what enlightened people around the world have always done, and see them as something which enriches, not impoverishes, our communities.
Further to his analysis of the current state-of-play regarding EU-UK trade negotiations , Ian Bartle argues that any deal will be a hard Brexit – but still not as bad as a catastrophic no-deal As the UK and European Union resume negotiations over a trade deal, one thing is abundantly clear: even if there’s a […]